I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
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