Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Not really how I planned to achieve immortality, but I'll take it.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
