he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
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