You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
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