I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Police were just in my backyard to recover a loaded .38. What the fuck?????
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
Randomize
