its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
you mean i was at the winter classic?
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
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