saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize
