Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
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