btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
