hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
Randomize
