you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Randomize
