maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
There are both cum and chocolate stains on my sheets. Can't decide whether this is a new low or a new high.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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