Yo dont text me then not text me
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I woke up in a toga after going to a Hawaiian party. I don't even know.
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
I'm a grown ass woman, I need to get fucked
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