how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Had to take him to the ER for not only alcohol poisoning but for stepping on a firecracker. Happy 4th holy fuck
Randomize