Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm glad the semester is over. I need a break from the term "whiskey sharts" coming up so much in conversation.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
