I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Just heard this lady walk by on her phone saying "did everyone orgasm?"
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I should send him a pic of my crotch with the caption "thanks for the memories"
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
Randomize
