I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
The air taste purple.
Randomize