This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
Randomize
