she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
my mouth tastes like poor choices
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
He got drunk and insisted on licking my eyeball and called it a test of my trust in him.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I am such a fucking liability at weddings. I ended up making out with this married 40-year-old that told me that basically if I came home with him and be a sex partner for him and his wife, I would never have to pay for anything again. Extremely considered it.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
