so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
but i am gonna have to have sex w/ him again to get my earrings back
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Your philanthropic work just got me laid, thanks dad for naming me #2.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
