Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
The more drunk I get the more I want to steal a lamb
What would be the possible repercussions of lamb theft
Randomize
