put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
There's lube on my homework. #priorities
3 weeks in a row I've pulled '69' at the deli counter...God is giving me shit for not getting laid in a year....
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