I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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