I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
My potted cactus died. I am literally less nurturing than the desert.
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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