Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
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