There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
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