using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
I understand Curling. That high.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
She's like the Oprah of therapy. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. AND YOU GET A STRAITJACKET. WITH A PADDED ROOOOM
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Randomize
