so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
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