It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
i have a girlfriend
if you're drunk do you have a girlfriend?
no
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Randomize
