She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
