I wannas sexs uuuuu
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
Green mimosas i think yes
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Randomize
