I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
His cat kept scratching my feet while we were having sex. There's only room for one pussy around here. It also concerns me that he owns a cat.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
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