it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Okay the common myth about putting tampons in you nostrils for a nose bleed is busted. It just starts coming out through your throat.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
So I just had breakfast and then sex in a parking garage before he went to school and thus I am loving my life
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
GOD I WOULD STAB DANNY IN THE EYE WITH HIS OWN PENIS
.........That big, huh?
No. I would cut it off
Randomize
