Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
he made a joke about you fucking his daughter...i think youre golden
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
Randomize
