im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
i just got yelled at for having sex. this sorority thing is worst than being at home. at least at home they think im still a virgin
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
