I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Look bro I'll go half per boob with you, we split her.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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