I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Please tell me that nice older woman you're with at the bar is not your comp&lit professor.
Randomize
