Just had to open a tuna can with a spoon. Gave me a sense of hunting for my own food.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future�
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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