We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
As yoda would say; A bitch, she is.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
Drunk is a universal language darling
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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