problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
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