So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Blow job season was short but glorious.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
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