He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
we got stoned then he started showing me how to make his penis look like a hamburger...if that's not true love idk what love is
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
