It's Friday. Sex?
and you said cock pushups were impossible
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
Randomize
