Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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