porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Munching saltines, sippin Gatorade, and trying not to get eaten by this small horse
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
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