I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Hmm. I hear gunshots, car horns blaring, hear drunk white people screaming, and see about fifty status updates pertaining to the hawks. I guess they won.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
