i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I appreciate you letting me know that the bird died but why didn't you do something about the corpse? or at least give me a heads up that it was still in the cage..Jesus
you have no idea how hungover I am. I can't deal with death right now.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
Randomize
