Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
Randomize
