i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
You were jumping on the trampoline and screaming that you couldn't feel the fire.
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
You were literally hanging out the window and dancing to the remix to Ignition when we drove you home
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
Randomize
