no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Oh and someone pissed in my shoes, so I'll let you figure that out.
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
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